Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Understanding The True Lover Tests

By Sharon Weeks


We have all been in those situations where we feel an unexplainable feeling of excitement and euphoria. This feeling occurs especially when one meets or talks to that wonderful person that you have always longed for his or her attention. One may think that he or she is falling in love but you really have to question yourself whether it is truly love. The true lover tests will help you know whether whatever you are experiencing is really love or just a period of infatuation.

A number of times those in strong relationships find that their love is decreasing. This is so since most affairs are built on infatuation rather than on the basis of true love. The feeling of true love is always mutual. This makes the wishes and expectations of lovers bear no fruit in many occasions. This becomes the reason why every day a divorce case is being filed in our courts of law.

To get to know which feeling is haunting you, the long term implications and expectations of that affair should ring in your mind. Theories have it that a successful love should be composed of intimacy, commitment and passion. Failure to strike a balance among the three is the reason why marriages end up being strained. The intimate couple that is not committed to the marriage cannot last for a longer period of time.

The test of time. True love grows with time while infatuation diminishes as time goes by. Get to know how hurriedly you start labeling certain feelings as love, realize if you have other words you use to describe such feelings. Supposing you find yourself falling in love every now and then and very early, and later you get disappointed, then keeping this test in mind will save your from a future heartache.

The security test. Love that is genuine needs and nurtures a sense of trust and security. A person who is infatuated seems to lack the sense of security, is based upon wishful thinking instead of careful consideration. When one is infatuated, he/she becomes blind to problems. Security is able to flow out of deep knowledge on the character, track record and values of the other person.

The important aspect to check is trust. This can be manifested by how secure you feel in that relationship. A person in love sees the future with his or her lover. An infatuated person will still have wishes even when in relationship. This makes such a person blind to various problems affecting them. Security threat is experienced as a result of distrust in the character. This is also due to lack of appreciating other persons value.

Test of stability. True love will endure all obstacles. Infatuation may change all over sudden and unpredictably. When you are infatuated, the wind blows and one just falls in love. True love does not happen this way, it is more stable and there is commitment. Stability test is quite hard to apply to a relationship that is measured in only some few days or weeks.

When we know what love is really is, we get to know that challenges will always be there. It is important that you walk through the issues and enjoy every beautiful moment that you share with your partner.




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